My Political Screed

I've been ignoring politics to the extent that I can, because I have too much to do to become completely unhinged.  Still, you don't have to be paying that much attention to realize that we've passed through batshit fucking insane and into whatever territory lies beyond that. Here there be tygers.

In a rational world, where there was hope of a thoughtful god and not some Lovecraftian monstrosity waiting for a seal to open, people like Sharron Angle, Christine O'Donnell, Jim DeMint, Haley Barbour, Carl Paladino, Newt Gingrich, Rand Paul and countless others still spilling from the bottomless clown car would be paraded in streets with dunce caps on, so that children could point and laugh and throw rotten fruit. They would not be discussed in polite company. They would be summarily dismissed for the lunatics they are, and left only to mutter their senseless diatribes on street corners, where sane people would give them a wide berth. If we were merciful, they would be left in peace to sit on the benches outside the public library and eat jello with their hands as they converse intently with their nightlight jesus.

But this is apparently not a rational world. Even if I had the worst case of Tourrettes the world had ever seen, I could not adequately express the total fucked-up fuckedupedness that is swirling around right now. There's a little voice in my head that wants to whisper, "Go ahead, motherfuckers. As Don Henley sang, we get the government we deserve. You get what you fucking vote for, cocksuckers, so I hope you fucking choke on it.  And in 200 years those of use who can still read will look back and realize Mike Judge was fucking Nostradamus."

But then I realize that we're fucking strapped in next them on their rocket-sled to Fuckedupistan. If you pull the lever for anything but a Dem, or if you don't pull the lever at all, you're a fucking idiot. All you whiny concern trolls and teabaggers and fucking little pity victims can sit around jacking off to your 9/11 torture porn or your little black book of slights,  with your high fructose corn syrup slushies in your grubby paws, and wait for fucking Armageddon, I've got no sympathy for you. You don't have to even like the Dems -- hey, Mary Landrieu is my fucking senator -- but if you side with the Republicans after what they've become, may your petty little imaginary god have mercy on your blackened, shriveled little souls.

You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming.