Alexander Ovechkin is the Samuel L. Jackson of Commercials

Stephen King once said that maybe every movie would be a little better if it had Samuel L. Jackson in it. I posit that every commercial would be enhanced by including Alexander Ovechkin.





I like Ovechkin because in a world that seems to gravitate to the duality of black/white, red/blue, Twilight's Team what's-his-name/Team the-other-guy, in the inevitable Ovechkin/Crosby matchup, Ovechkin could grind SidneyfuckingCrosby into a fine paste and brush what's left of his teeth with it.






Thank you, Russia, for vodka, Lomonosov porcelain animal figurines, and Alexander Ovechkin.